[The answer comes so swiftly that he almost sounds harsh, which is the last thing he wants. It's just that he can hear that vulnerable little note in Astarion's voice, and gods know he can picture the face that goes with it. The uncertain flicker of his eyes, followed by the doeish stare that begs for sincerity and love in equal shares . . . oh, amatus. His footsteps are hurried now, wandering off the beaten path so he can settle himself beneath the shelter of a large tree— all the better to focus on what matters.]
Kadan. [Softer. Soothing. Safe.] There is a difference between things that are kept away out of malicious intent or guilt, and things that are too difficult to talk about until they come up. This was the latter, not the former. And I do not fear the former, not from you. Not ever.
[Leto closes his eyes, tipping his head back to thump gently against the trunk.]
There are things in my past I have not told you. Things that fit that category. Not secrets, but . . .
[But it's hard. But there are things that haunt them both, and things that are too hard to admit to, even when it's dark and quiet.]
I trust you, Astarion. I asked only because I know what it is to not want to think of such things . . . and because I did not expect the admission. It frightens me, but only ever for your sake. I . . .
[Mm.]
It is hard, even now, not to think like a warrior and a bodyguard. I suspect I always will. It is why I seek to know all that I can learn of vampires and how to defeat them— and it is why this took me aback, for it is not a threat I have ever had to factor in before.
no subject
No. No, Astarion—
[The answer comes so swiftly that he almost sounds harsh, which is the last thing he wants. It's just that he can hear that vulnerable little note in Astarion's voice, and gods know he can picture the face that goes with it. The uncertain flicker of his eyes, followed by the doeish stare that begs for sincerity and love in equal shares . . . oh, amatus. His footsteps are hurried now, wandering off the beaten path so he can settle himself beneath the shelter of a large tree— all the better to focus on what matters.]
Kadan. [Softer. Soothing. Safe.] There is a difference between things that are kept away out of malicious intent or guilt, and things that are too difficult to talk about until they come up. This was the latter, not the former. And I do not fear the former, not from you. Not ever.
[Leto closes his eyes, tipping his head back to thump gently against the trunk.]
There are things in my past I have not told you. Things that fit that category. Not secrets, but . . .
[But it's hard. But there are things that haunt them both, and things that are too hard to admit to, even when it's dark and quiet.]
I trust you, Astarion. I asked only because I know what it is to not want to think of such things . . . and because I did not expect the admission. It frightens me, but only ever for your sake. I . . .
[Mm.]
It is hard, even now, not to think like a warrior and a bodyguard. I suspect I always will. It is why I seek to know all that I can learn of vampires and how to defeat them— and it is why this took me aback, for it is not a threat I have ever had to factor in before.